Emotional Intelligence and Integrity

March 2nd, 2017 by Patricia Jehle Leave a reply »

Integrity and Emotional Intelligence

I’ve been thinking about emotional intelligence and integrity recently since I’ve been reading Daniel Goleman’s book, Working with Emotional Intelligence and the news is full of questions regarding certain people’s integrity. The definition of integrity is given at the end of this blog and I will give my considerations of the two concepts in the next paragraphs.

Emotional intelligence is how we apply our personal and social emotional skills in life.

Our personal emotional skills are listed under two sub categories: self-awareness and self-regulation. Both are important in helping us to be a whole and integrated person: self-awareness is about whether we know what we are feeling, if we are able to clearly assess ourselves and if we are healthily self-confident whereas self regulation is about self-control, being trustworthy, being conscientious, being adaptable, and being innovative (creative). All these qualities and skills makes you a healthy human when it comes to yourself. But we don’t live in vacuums, so the social aspect is also very important.

Our social emotional skills focus on our reactions to others (from within- empathy) and our inter-actions (working with the others – social). The empathetic skills are: understanding others, developing others, serving others, leveraging diversity, and political (systemic) awareness. The social skills are influencing, effective communication, conflict management, leadership, change catalyst, building bonds, collaboration and cooperation, and team capabilities (both as a member and leader).

When you add Emotional Intelligence to Integrity you come up with a winning combination whether it comes to a new hire, to a new start-up team member, or also, when meeting new people. These are the people, even if they are of the introvert style, that your potential clients and partners are drawn to.

One of the best ways to look at the picture is the three circles below: where it meets in what we do, how we do it and why we do it is our emotional intelligence. Our integrity is going in that direction with our whole hearts and keeping our trustworthiness and conscientiousness foremost in our actions.

Remember that our direction is lost when we do something that is not in congruence with our character and goals. When we try to take short cuts by hurting others and climbing over their backs, we are actually hurting ourselves. Thus, being transparent about decisions when you are a manager or in any kind of leadership will keep you true to yourself and to your goals. It will keep you accountable and on track for success.

So, keep your eyes on the goal and remember what Shakespeare wrote in Hamlet, “To thine own (and to others, I might add) self be true”.

“If we can align these three rings, we are putting our best selves forward.  We have integrity between action and intention – and with purpose.   We do the right things, in the right ways, for the right reasons.  This reason I’m committed to practicing emotional intelligence is that it gives me a way to create integrity – alignment between who I am and who I mean to be.” http://www.6seconds.org/2013/08/07/integrity-intention-emotional-intelligence/ (including circle diagram)

Have a great weekend!

Patricia Jehle

www.jehle-coaching.com

patricia@jehle-coaching.com

 

NOTES:

For another look on transparency and success: https://www.entrepreneur.com/article/276671

 

Integrity

Definition: noun

1. 
the quality of being honest and having strong moral principles. “a gentleman of complete integrity”

synonyms: honesty, uprightness, probity, rectitude, honour, honourableness, upstanding-ness, good character, principle(s), ethics, morals, righteousness, morality, nobility, high-mindedness, right-mindedness,

noble-mindedness, virtue, decency, fairness, scrupulousness, sincerity, truthfulness, trustworthiness

“I never doubted his integrity”

 

antonyms:  
  dishonesty

 

2. 
the state of being whole and undivided. “upholding territorial integrity and national sovereignty”

synonyms: unity, unification, wholeness, coherence, cohesion, undividedness, togetherness, solidarity, coalition

“internal racial unrest threatened the integrity of the federation”

 

From Wikipedia: “In ethics, integrity is regarded by many people as the honesty and truthfulness or accuracy of one’s actions.“- reflected in transparent honesty and complete harmony in what one thinks, says, and does (my thoughts).

 

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